Where the Carol Bird Sings

An Exquisite Gown of Love

Our son Thomas was born. He died. And he had to be buried. And I thought about what I wanted him to be wearing when we laid him in his coffin. I

Not a Problem

Rocket grinned. She drooled a bit too. I opened the car door and she leapt in. She walked around in a circle and then settled herself on the back seat. The kids

Letting Go of Another of Thomas’ Places

She was getting to be an old lady. You see, she was 26 years old. She did her best and was quite reliable, but she tended to huff and puff every time

Nothing to Say?

I really have nothing to say. I’ve hit a wall. Too many stories in such a short time, I guess. It seems I’ve run right out of inspiration. No, don’t go away.

Just in Case

My husband Andy and I didn’t make many preparations for our sixth baby’s birth. We decided not to sort out the baby equipment or the clothes we had packed away from previous

Graves: Wild Imaginings

When I die, I’d like a proper grave with a headstone and one of those slabs that prevents people walking on top of you. “I want a proper burial,” I say to

How Many Children Do You Have? (Part 4)

We wanted a large family. Felicity was born, and within eighteen months she had a brother. Shortly after Duncan’s first birthday, we found out we were expecting another baby. Our family was

To Whom Shall I Go?

The day after Thomas’ funeral I visited Father F. “I feel so angry with God,” I confessed. “All the doctors told me that there was little possibility that Thomas would live after birth, but

Remembering the Grieving Mothers

Mary and Joseph are curled up on the floor together with the child Jesus. They are trying to keep their eyes tightly closed. An angel in a long flowing gown appears through

Come!

The last time I went to get my hair cut I shocked the hairdresser. “Do any of your girls still believe in Santa?” she asked. “None of them have ever believed in

This Morning I Saw Thomas

This morning I saw Thomas. My bedroom door opened and Gemma-Rose appeared. Without a word, she slipped under the quilt next to me and snuggled up close. Her deliciously cool skin touched

If Only…

“Do you remember the year Dad decided to barbeque the turkey and it went up in flames?” We were sitting around the dinner table last night, remembering past Christmas meals. “Yeah. He

How Many Children Do You Have? (Part 3)

We’re at a homeschool conference. It’s time for the introductions session. I’ve slipped away from the hall. So has my husband Andy. As I hurry along the path, I see him ahead